ha ha ha ha ha ha . . .
me not very happy right now. I don't know how it started this morning, but this entire week just hasn't been my WEEK.
I've been feeling like crap all day. My head and throat hurts, and my nose is stuffed more than a kid at an all-you-can-eat pizza buffet.
I got really depressed near lunch. I swear, if it weren't for 'Anda, i would have left to slit my wrists in the bathroom. I'ma gonna write her a comic cause I lov her and all. She deserves that.
At lunch, Kira got on my case. Okay, I spend the 30 minute lunch period in the library. The tables are big enough for 4 people, 5 if they all squish. By the time Kira and four other people show up, our table HAS four people, and they all move in on OUR table. So, me being claustrophobic and crowd-hating, I move. Today, however, I was sitting alone and invited them to sit with me, cause maybe they would help me feel better. WRONG-O.
Kira starts chewing me out cause I move when they show up and now I invited them to sit with me.
How can I tell her - or anyone - how I feel? There are days when I can barely stand to acknowledge my own existence. That was today. I can't really explain that to people without getting them worried.
I'm sorry, guys, but I can't help this. There's nothing left of me anymore. I wish that I was a better person - maybe I could deal with some of this without making people worry.
I'm a killer, cold and wrathful.
Silent sleeper, I've been inside your bedroom.
I've murdered half the town,
Left you love notes on their headstones...
I'll fill the graveyards until I have you.
Moonlight walking, I smell your softness,
Carnivorous and lusting to track you down among the pines.
I want you stuffed into my mouth,
Hold you down and tear you open, live inside you - love, I'd never hurt you...
But I'll grind against your bones until our marrows mix,
I will eat you slowly...
Oh, the horror of our love...
Never so much blood pulled through my veins...
Oh... The horror of our love... Never so much blood...
I wake in terror, blackbirds screaming.
Dark cathedrals spilling midnight on their altars.
I'm your servant, my immortal,
Pale and perfect, such unholy heaving -
The statues close their eyes, the room is changing,
Break my skin and drain me.
Ancient language, speak through fingers,
the awful edges where you end and I begin.
Inside your mouth, I cannot see -
There's catastrophe in everything I'm touching
As I sweat and crush you...
And I hold your beating chambers until they beat no more...
You die like angels sing!
Oh, the horror of our love...
Never so much blood pulled through my veins...
Oh... The horror of our love... Never so much blood...
You're a ghost, love, nightgown flowing...
Your body blue and walking along the continental shelf.
You are a dream among the sharks,
Beautiful and terrifying, lit and restless...
We dance in dark suspension...
And you bury me in the ocean floor beneath you
Where they'll never hear us scream...
Oh, the horror of our love...
Never so much blood pulled through my veins...
Oh... The horror of our love... Never so much blood...
The Horror Of Our Love
~Jink
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